Wow, I have been having some major convictions these days. I believe it is through the preaching of God's word. Although it kills me inside, I thank God for loving me to reveal some sick (not used in positive sense) things within myself.
Man, i am so freaken prideful! But its not like the obvious visible pride, but the subtle kind, do you know what i mean? Like you don't realize that it is pride until God's word or the preaching of his word just smacks you across the head. Then you realize what you have been doing isn't actually humility, but pride.
It makes me sick to my stomach, it really does. God help me for realz! How wretched i am, seriously! I found it that even in sharing Christ with others, I want to receive some 'kudos' like I have gained any wisdom on my own in the things of Christ. What I am trying to do is get a 'piece', a piece of God's glory. Dude, are you serious? (Sorry, talking to myself)
I haven't even started my MDIV program and God is speaking to me and wanting to stretch and grow me. I thank Him with all my heart that he is revealing the painful realities of my sinful nature. God is teaching me that the purpose my life is for his Glory. That I decrease and that He Increases (John the Baptist).
Lord, please help me with the temptation of wanting to take a piece of the Glory that is yours and yours alone! Teach me humility, Christ's humility, that you may increase and that I may decrease for your Glory. Amen
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